5.11.2005

Finally, a paranoia I don't have!

I read an article today about national ID system, where everybody would have an ID card (gasp!). And people are FREAKING out about this. I mean, the conspiracy people are FREAKING.

Uh...why?

What are they going to do to me with an ID card? Even if it had a super secret microchip that they could read via satellite?

But they could TRACK you!

Yeah, uh, where? I mean, if it's the job of some poor son of a bitch to track my movements between my bed and my couch with an occasional trip to the deli or to a comedy show, god bless him. Good luck. Any outrage I might feel at being observed is surely avenged by the fact that my life couldn't possibly be less interesting, and that dumb fuck HAS TO WATCH. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! I win! I so win!

I feel the same way when people suggest that there is some sort of a tracking chip implanted in the new 20 dollar bills. Uh, so? What then? So, let me understand this -- I'm supposed to be worried about someone tracking what I do with my 20 dollarses? Hell, I'll fucking TELL them. What, am I buying subversive groceries? All they had to do was ask.

I wish that I WAS worried. If there was some crazy government organization that wanted to track my movements (and also could come up with a reason to do so) that would mean that the world was far more interesting than it is now, and there would be aliens at Area 51, and Nazi UFOs underneath the North Pole being piloted by Bigfeet. Sadly, this is not the case.

And I mean that. It is sad. I wish the world was that exciting. Instead, we have to have jobs and shit.

Please, New World Order, please take over. I would MUCH rather be hiding out in a cave like in Red Dawn than all of this nonsense.

Wolverines!!!!!!

4 comments:

LORMO said...

Ever read The Handmaid's Tale?

I encourage you to be more paranoid about this, Jeff.

Really, this lack of paranoia is just doing us all a disservice.

We COUNT on your paranoia, Jeff.

AFM said...

hahaha - half of me agrees, the other half is remembering the evil that men do with power. Knowing exactly where people are and where they are going is power. I have a feeling it will be used in advertising though.

What is Europe like these days? Lots of soldiers in airports and junk like this too?

AFM said...

Oh yeah, and WOLVERINES!!!!

Jeff Mac said...

Yeah, THAT I get -- advertising. Somebody is gonna find a way to make money off of this.

Gosh, I hope it's me.