For some people old movies are a religion, but they usually just bore the crap out of me (the movies, not the people. Ok, maybe both.) To me, these films seem to be about a bunch of well dressed people who go around drinking and smoking at each other.
And eventually, someone will grab some unsuspecting woman by the shoulders and make out with her, real hard, for two or three seconds. One of those two people will cry and ask to be left alone. Then somebody will get socked in the jaw. And ultimately folks will drink and smoke at each other some more.
Somewhere in here, a bartender will wipe down the bar and say, "G'wan, get outta here!" And someone will refer to someone of similar age as "kid." That person will then smoke at the "kid" while explaining the meaning of life.
Oh, and people stand in the rain and yell at each other a lot. Old movie people are forever standing in the pouring rain. Go home, yell at each other indoors. There's an awning 3 feet away. I know, I get it, you're very passionate. I could tell by the yelling. Fine. Just go inside. (If it's any incentive, I heard there's a whole pack of cigarettes inside your house, just waiting to be smoked at somebody.)
Maybe these are great films, and I'm just not getting it. When I hear someone tell me how great old movies are, I privately think they just like hats.
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4 comments:
I couldn't agree more.
I like all the smoking and drinking though - the only thing good about the old timey days.
It pains me that y'all feel this way. One would expect more culture and refinement from a man whose chosen blogger photo depicts him brandishing a croquet mallet, and a woman in possession of not one, but two "motion lamps."
Hat-wearing, smoking, drinking, and screaming in the rain--hoary conventions, all. As are rapid-assault-makeouts, surly barkeeps, the phrase "I'll say," and gratuitously non-sexual winking. These things can be tiresome. But dudes, there are whole other genres of old movie--there may be old movies whose now-shopworn conventions you might just love! There's...Westerns! Not a lot of yelling in the rain, though it does check out on hat-wearing, smoking, drinking, RAMs etc. So you might not like them so much. They are rife with horses though, and I like a horse in a movie. Sometimes.
But, so...musicals! Try out some musicals.
But then if one of y'all starts snarkin' on Sound of Music it'll just upset me.
So just go on, Jeff and Lori, watch your zombie attacks and your Lifetime, your neo-modern-cine-2000-o-rama robots with breast cancer whose husbands are eaten by the undead...and turn out to have had a second secret family. Hatless all.
That's funny!! I do actually like old movies though-- they seem more honest and sillier than current movies, without trying to be so honest and silly-- nowadays, it's all about over-the-top cgi special effects and crap.
Raw Deal is a pretty gripping old movie drama. Props.
while i'll agree that present day movies are pretty much all remakes of old movies OR cgi crap but i really have to agree - that 1940s old movie crap - can't STAND them. so boring.
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