More Subway Letters

Dear Well Dressed Person Who Surely Pooped On the Train,

 

Good decision for you to do that? I couldn't say. Frankly, I don't know what your plans are for the day, so I couldn't tell you if that's going to work for you as the day wears on. Bold decision? Ten-four, good buddy.

 

Sincerely,

 

One of the people who have noses and opinions about where poop ought to be stored

 

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Dear Bird Flu,

 

Please don't come to the subway. I'm reading Stephen King's The Stand right now. And while I believe I would really enjoy surviving an apocalyptic event that might make my rush hour commute less crowded, I can't help but wonder if there wouldn't be some kind of a "downside" to something like this. Get over there in the birds where we can see you, and come out with your pseudopodia in the air.

 

-mac

 

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Dear Person Who I Can't Remember,

 

I had something funny to say about you, I'm just sure of it. But now I can't think of a thing about you. Were you maybe wearing funny shoes? Probably not, but I'm really at a loss here. I'm getting older, and they say that absolutely everything is the first thing to go. Boy were THEY right, huh? Ok, keep up the good work. Maybe I'll see you again sometime after I've had some caffiene in me.

 

-Jeff