Why have you not been updated by me in, like, a week? What's going on? I've compiled a short list of possible reasons for your reprehensible lack of being updated by me:
- The blogger in question (yours truly) has been spending his time announcing lists for which he has not yet thought of any contents. Like, you know, this one. This is probably disheartening for you, the receptacle into which such lists eventually are put.
- The grammar in list item #1, while lovely, is annoyingly correct. I'd think that might bother you. I'm not wild about it either, if that makes you feel any better.
- The internet was broken, and so I couldn't update you. Yeah, I'd think someone might have noticed. Or said something on the news like, "The internet is down, productivity soars," or "The internet is down, office workers begin beating each other to death with office furniture."
- Absolutely nothing amusing happened for 7 full days.
- It's too hot for humor. New York City feels like someone slit open a dead body and shoved me inside of it. Not unlike that creature that Han Solo cut open to keep Luke Skywalker warm in the beginning of "The Empire Strikes Back."
- Maybe you were depressed by the fact that I know the name of the species of creature mentioned in #5.
- It's a tautaun.
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